I haven’t been back to NYC in over a year. Feels like even longer. I miss it here. People love to argue about the “best” cities to live in. They always mention whatever their city has as highest on their own list of criteria. People in Los Angeles who love Los Angeles ALWAYS say the weather is great – which it is – and it’s a great argument for a great city. Those who love San Francisco cite the unique layout of the city, the great culture, and progressive social values. Those who hate it always talk about AIDS.

What’s going on in the “D”? That’s “D” for Detroit. Well, for people who hate Detroit it’s the shit economy, awful weather, and stacks of dead bodies from their seemingly endless cycle of homicides. For people that love Detroit, they’ll talk about the ’60’s and the Pistons. Which leads us to New York City, often called “The Greatest City In the World.” Bold, bold statement. Greatest. City. Ever. Is it? Again, that depends on your criteria for greatness in a city. What do you value? I’ve been here 24 hours and I feel myself falling in love all over again. This city has a heartbeat. It has, well, people, EVERYWHERE and with each other. Maybe that’s it. People are forced to be WITH one another. Everywhere else you have a choice. You drive to this or that part of town and that’s where you live, but here, if even for a few moments, the richest of the rich and the poorest of the poor cross paths and often bump elbows. It’s as if New York is the only real city and everywhere else is just doing a version of it.

Also, where else in the world has everything? Literally everything is available here. Every type of person and every language is here. Every bizarre interest, kinky fetish, delectable cuisine, article of clothing, type of neighborhood is available here. You want to see a kooky lady in a weird dress?

Kooky Lady in Weird Dress

There she is. She just walked out of Starbucks as if she wasn’t completely fucking nuts, which is the second greatest part about her existence in New York. The best part is that the majority of people, especially if they live here, also do not give a fuck about her crazy, crazy dress.

Personally, I need crazy people to enjoy a city. People like this:

After touching my dirty parts, I like to hug

See the oversized glasses, the lost gaze? That’s because this guy is totally nuts and there are thousands of him in New York. Some of them wander aimlessly, some of them shout vulgarities, and some of them touch themselves and then touch you. A real city has a lot of these guys. New York has ALL of these guys.

I’ll listen to anyone argue about why their city is great. Not anyone, but a lot of people. If you think Erie, PA is great you are a fucking dolt. But I’ll listen to other people talk about their great cities, but goddamn it’s hard to beat NYC. I have a boner for you, New York. I wish I had money. I might consider moving here.

Love, Tom

The rest of the weekend I’ll be at Gotham. Come on by and have a beer with me.